Wednesday, August 14, 2013

What Not to Say to a Pregnant Woman

Ever since I've begun spreading the word about my pregnancy, I've loathed enjoyed all of the unsolicited advice and comments I've been receiving from friends, family and strangers.  I've been keeping a written pregnancy journal in a notebook and have kept track of some of my favorites over the last 4 months. 

They range anywhere from rude to ignorant but all of them, I feel, are equally annoying.
  1. Your life is over now that you're having a baby and/or your life is over for the next 18 years, have fun!
    I would think the better thing to say would be, your life is just beginning.  I know things are going to be hard but I don't think of this as the end of my life.  I hope that doesn't happen for about 70-80 more years.
  2. You're never going to sleep again.
    Again, I know that the first year or two are going to be hard, but I do plan on doing a lot of reading about sleep training and how to get the baby onto a schedule. 
  3. You should probably sell your boat, fishing poles, husbands tools, classic car and anything else you enjoy as a hobby because you'll never get to enjoy it again.
    Sorry, but why would I sell a boat and a car that are paid off and will not go down in value over the few years just because I may not be able to use them?!  I think this one made me the most upset because my husband and I worked hard to get these things and I don't appreciate being told that I'll never use them again.  I am sure that a toddler would LOVE to be out on the boat for a few hours in the summer and when they get older will want to help daddy work on his car (or at least that's my hope). 
  4. You won't be able to get a baby in the backseat of your 4 door Honda Accord, better get a mini-van!
    Funny, there weren't mini-vans when our parents were kids and oddly enough my parents never owned one.  They managed to put us in the backseat of a two door Bronco!  I'm not getting rid of my car, that I love, is paid off and gets 32 mpg, just because I'm having a baby.
  5. Better you than me, I'm so glad I'm not having any more kids!
    Good for you!  Maybe if I would have gotten married 5-10 years ago I would be done having kids as well but I didn't so here we are!
  6. You're going back to work?  Do you know how expensive child care can be?
    I think the better question is, do you know about my finances?!  If you are anyone but my husband and parents/in-laws then the answer should be no.  Everyone has to make their own choices about staying home or not and to be frank, there is no way we can afford it!
  7. Next summer you'll be sitting at home with a crying baby while everyone else with grown children are out on vacations and having a good time.
    Well good for you and good for those people.  This is also one of the rude things I am so sick of hearing!
  8. Your kids will become your life and you won't get to do much of anything that you enjoy anymore. 
    I remember being a kid and having babysitters, so my parents could go out and enjoy an evening together without loosing their sanity.  I know there are some people who don't like to leave their children, and that's fine but I don't expect to never have any fun again because I have a child.  Won't watching them grow be fun?  Won't we do fun things as a family or, heaven forbid, without the child?!
I'm sure that most of the mothers reading this can agree that though pregnancy is such an exciting time, people just don't know what to say to you.  It probably doesn't help that your emotions are on such a roller-coaster that you're offended by nearly everything someone says, every look you receive and every awful piece of advice or comment.  If I had the guts, I would reply to these people with the answers I've written in this post, but for now I will just smile and remember how special this time should be and that mean people can go fly a kite!

Amanda is a 20-something blogger from the Central Ohio area who writes about marriage, life in the country, family, friends and pregnancy at her blog Welcome to My Life.   


  1. well good for you!! enjoy it - every minute of it as its such a blessing xox

  2. Thanks so much for letting me guest blog with you lovely ladies!!!!

    1. Thank YOU so much for writing such a wonderful post :) You are welcome to guest blog on here any time!

  3. Awesome post! Thank you so much for sharing.

    1. Glad you enjoyed it and thanks for stopping by, be sure to check out more from Amanda on her blog as well :)


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